Friday, July 11, 2008

I can't always control the conversation...

I was driving Lola to camp and desperately wanted to listen to the local morning radio show for two minutes. Every Thursday morning they have something called the "Thursday Hook Up" where three men answer one woman's questions and she picks a bachelor to have dinner with.

Although the show is rated PG, I listen to it on the lowest volume. My entry level Honda minivan does not have special volume controls and it is all or nothing.

The kiddos were completely engrossed in their own conversation as I was engrossed in figuring out who Nicole would choose. The computer engineer that prefers staying in, the roofer that likes to dance, or perhaps the accountant that has never seriously dated. I did not even notice the PG words they were using.

"MAMA!!! They said stupid." Jay yelled, over Fifi's wailing to get out of the car seat.

"And they said UGLY, Mama. They said UGLY!!!" Lola chirped in.

Ugly and stupid are two words I really dislike. I just don't like them, no rhyme or reason, and the kiddos know that.

"No one is stupid, Mama. Right?" Jay asked.

"No one is UGLY, Mama. Right?" Lola has started to mimic every single thing Jay says or does lately.

"I just don't like those words. Lola doesn't like cheese and Jay doesn't like mushrooms and I don't like those ugly words." I proclaimed.

"You just said UGLY." Jay broke out in a fit of giggles.

"But, Mama. You told me that no one is ugly." Lola declared. Yes, I did tell her this after she determined that one of her preschool friends was ugly and didn't want to play with her. I am determined to raise a compassionate girl. I had too many mean girl altercations in junior high.

"No one IS ugly."

"But some people are SPECIAL, not ugly, right Mama?" Jay chimed in with a smile. "When Uncle Mike took me to the movies in Chicago he told me that some people are SPECIAL."

"What did Uncle Mike tell you?"

"He told me that the kids on the SHORT bus are SPECIAL." He grinned out loud, proud of retaining some of Uncle Mike's great knowledge. "Uncle Mike said that all the kids on that very short bus are SPECIAL."

"Next time you talk to Uncle Mike, tell him he is a VERY special guy." I told him and shook my fist in the air. I couldn't help but laugh out loud, trying to picture what in the world my brother and son were talking about.

71classy comments:

Mr Lady said...

Is uncle Mike single, or at least low on morals? Because I think I have a crush on him. :)

Immoral Matriarch said...

LOLOLOLOLOL!!!!!!

lattemommy said...

Hmmm.... does moving to Chicago mean being closer to Uncle Mike? Just think of what Jay will know this time next year! :)

Kj said...

Ha Ha. Does Uncle Mike read this blog too? Too funny.

I've told my little chatter-box that it's against the rules in our house to use the word stupid. Ugly hasn't come up yet, but I'll be sure to add it to the list when it does. I guess it must be a mum thing...

Cheri @ Blog This Mom! said...

Uncle Mike might be related to Laura's uncles. Oy.

Smoochefrg said...

Oh my!

carrie said...

Once I said "shut-up" in front of my kids (I was speaking to the dog . . . that time) and they nearly lost their minds.

"Mooooom, you can't say that!!!!"

So, um, yeah. I totally get this.

Kristen said...

That is so funny!

We too have words they aren't supposed to say. They even let me know if they hear someone say them too.

Sounds like Uncle Mike might need some of his own kids to teach, and leave the teaching of yours to you!

:)

DysFUNctional Mom said...

ha ha ha!! I love the word special. It works in so many situations.

Buttermouth said...

I knew that saying that would come back to haunt me :)

What was I supposed to say when Jay asked me, "Why do some kids ride the short bus?".

"It' because they're special" seemed like the only good answer.

Kim said...

I am sorry I can't stop laughing.. hahahaha.. they do hear everything!

JIC- Kimmylyn

Indy said...

Love it.

SuburbanCorrespondent said...

Glad to hear someone else gets worked up over words!

LceeL said...

We don't like those words, either. However, it DOES kind of limit your ability to react to somebody who is actually stupid - or doing something stupid (or something that is ugly - but you get the idea). So, when we get the notion that, perhaps, someone is acting in a maner the decries a lower level of intelligence, we say they're a B.O.R. A Box of Rocks. As in "Dumber than a box of rocks".

Stephanie said...

Haha! I love it! I cannot wait for Karys to start having conversations. I can only imagine what will come out of her mouth! ;)

Secret Agent Mama said...

I {puffy heart} Uncle Mike!

Smart A$$ Mom said...

thats a good one! laughing aloud at uncle mike and his commentary. you should hear the stuff my sister tells my kids!

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

We don't use those words either
My kids freak out at the sign of any school bus--'public school-gross'--I have an 'Uncle Mike' relative myself apparently ;)

Kelley said...

Sounds a lot like my uncle Mike.

He also used to kill huge spiders and chase me around the house with them. And threaten to set fire to our cat.

Meg said...

I struggled with "shut up" forever.

Now with the non-stop whining about why we don't have a big screen TV, or trampoline, or membership to the pool, I frequently find myself using it.

Victoria said...

Do all children have those uncles? 'Cause we have Uncle Neil. I love Uncle Neil. I also loathe Uncle Neil.

Crystal D said...

Oh we have one of "those" uncles. LOL
He let my kids watch the Simpsons, and then something gross about a man drinking water squeezed out of elephant poop (on of those survivor shows I think).

The Diva's Thoughts said...

LOL Totally hilarious. Kids DO hear EVERYTHING. lol

katie said...

nice... that is hillarius. Some people are SPECIAL.

lol

Karen said...

Special is good. As long as that isn't turned into a bad word, too.

Ali said...

too funny. my kids have an uncle mike too. an uncle mike who told them ALL about the short bus. hahaha.

Flea said...

Sounds like Uncle Mike is a VERY special guy. I'll bet he rode the short bus too, huh?

Mandy said...

Too funny!!!! Uncle Mike rocks!!!

It is nice for him to take the time to teach his nephew something positive and compassionate.

My hubby is an awesome uncle as well and the way he handles delicate topics with the kiddos is awesome!!!

Our kiddos and nephews really look up to him and he is one guy I wouldn't mind being a role model. :)

Don Mills Diva said...

Make sure you teach Jay to do air quotes when he tells Uncle Mike he is "special".

moooooog35 said...

We people on the short bus ARE special!

And don't you forget it!

I LIKE CHEESE!

BLUE PANSIES ARE TRIANGLES!

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

Man don'cha just hate it when the wee ones hoist you up on your own petard? I know I always did. :)

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

So the Special Forces go into battle on short buses? Wait, I'm confused. ;)

Eve Grey said...

I really really really hate the words stupid, fat & ugly myself. They are just mean. My kids almost think these are swear words. God, I'm such a brainwasher.

ThatGirl said...

I'm a gutter mouth, can Uncle Mike save me?

SF said...

My kids have an Uncle Mike and her name Aunt Trika. You should hear some of the knowledge she's imparted on them!

Makes Uncle Mike look like Mr Rogers!

SF said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Shannon said...

LOL at Uncle Mike!! To be honest I have struggled trying to explain stuff like that to my own kids . . . I try to be so careful to phrase everything in politically correct manner, half the time I panic and don't know what words to use. So different from when I was a kid, kids were a lot more harsh with their terms then. But I totally agree with ugly and stupid - I spend half my time explaining why WE can't use those words, but sometimes other people do.

MamaWise said...

HAHA, I love your brother... too funny!

Can't wait to see you tonight!

THopgood said...

Add to that list "shut-up" and "that sucks"...the newest addition to our ugly words list...it grows weekly!

Kathryn said...

Oops. Hehe.

Kash said...

Ha, and this is why Jay adores him!?

Helen E.M. Wright said...

hehehehe

The Daily Stroll said...

That's hillarious! We enforce the "no yelling" in our house and the other day I was yelling at Josh to grab something from upstairs and Jonah pointed his finger at me and said "No yelling Mommy" and then of course he put me in timeout! All I could do was apologize for yelling as I was laughing. It's funny how quick they pick these things up especially from other relatives!

mamatulip said...

Uh...LOL at your brother. That is so something my husband would say.

This morning we were listening to the radio and someone in a commercial said shut up. Guess how fast my kids picked up on that?

Clare Frederick said...

You've gotta love the kid/uncle interactions. I always hold my breath when they come over to visit my family. They can be a lot of "fun!"

Jill said...

I'm beginning to believe that all uncles think it's their "right" to teach their nieces and nephews a few key phrases to surprise their parents.

Mine loves to watch the kids giggle when he says, "doody."

Thanks.

Kimber said...

That Uncle Mike--he cracks me up.

Kim
Ps. I am driving the HOnda minivan too:)

Amy said...

My husband has said the same thing and the girls have definitely picked up on it. And there is a short bus that drives through the neighborhood, thankfully not picking up any of their friends because I am not interested in having that discussion.
Just caught up on your blog girl. Hope you had a fab time in Chicago and are enjoying your summer!

Rhea said...

There are a lot more Uncle Mikes out there there you think. Everytime we visited my younger sister, my boys got a new work added to their vocabulary...and not a good one!!

mommynotes said...

Sarah who is 6 will correct me all the time if we say hate or stupid. We never call anyone that just say it out of habit. I apologize and we move on. So cute! LOL!

mommynotes said...

My husband's brother "uncle Ryan" taught my Sarah as a toddler to stick her tongue out at people and spit. She quickly learned that this is not kosher with us. Uncle Ryan was 21 at the time.

Nap Warden said...

That is so funny...we have an Uncle Mike in this family (my bro). Sometimes I think he belongs on the short bus. I will be doing a post on him next week:)

LaskiGal said...

You gotta love those crazy uncles . . .

I think it is awesome how you are already teaching them the value of language! If more parents did, we might not have so much UGLY and STUPID . . .

Jane the Sane said...

I love in the Incredibles when the mom says, "Everyone is special, Dash" and he says, "That's another way of saying nobody is special". Or something like that. We can't all be special or pretty or smart. Darn it all. But I know what you mean about wanting to raise a compassionate kid. If the parents don't do it the world certainly won't. My goodness, I am a ray of sunshine tonight!

A Whole Lot of Nothing said...

Damn uncles and their "ideas."

atypeamommy said...

Wow, I haven't heard anyone talk about the "short bus" in about 20+ years. Won't it be fun when Uncle Mike has kids . . . .

TUTU Monkey said...

Too funny!!


Have fun at BLOGHER!! It sounds like so much fun!!

I enjoyed your blog:)

Tara R. said...

Gotta love that uncle... too funny. I bet he was a hoot growing up with.

April said...

Do they still have short buses?

To quote the Incredibles: "Everyone's special." "Which means that nobody is."

krissy said...

I always avoid hard conversations by saying "Ask your Father!"

He finds this irritating. I find it entertaining.

Natalie Jane said...

Nice. I believe my younger sister was the call in women that day :)

Valarie said...

My children call the word stupid the "s word." It gets very confusing to other people that come into our home and use the word "stupid" and then have to deal with my children running around saying "awwwww, she said the s word.....awwww" and giggling.

Allison Says said...

Haha that is hilarious. What an Uncle to be sharing that wisdom ;) That's what uncles are for, right?

I understand why you don't like those words. For children, especially, they can be very dangerous.

Symphony of Love said...

I do not like the word 'stupid.' Whenever I heard my friend or family using it, I will ask them not to use it. And I definitely agree with you when you told your children that no one is ugly. We must learn to appreciate the good of people and to look beyond the physical. Just as Helen Keller said, "The best and most beautiful things in this world cannot be seen or even heard, but must be felt with the heart."

It is good to be raising compassionate and understanding kids. One of my friends has a special boy and just the other day she was telling me that her son is sad sometimes that other children are always teasing his look and laughing at him. However, she told me that he still prayed for these children and prayed that all bad things to go away. What better way than to be forgiving to those who made fun of oneself. No wonder she is so proud of her boy. She shared with me her story once at Mom, I Graduated Today!

krissy said...

Just start handing the hate mail off to me.....seriously. I approach it with a different attitude.

They way I see it is that your post are not worthy of hate mail. Mine, yes. Your's NO! But I think you are beautiful, in everything. And don't let words are haters make decisions for you like what your next post will be. They are insecure and low class.

Us Cancer's have many different traits. I am all about confronting the idiots and giving them my word. I always have the last word. Don't hide your hate mail from your friends....cuz I will shove a chain saw up their rear end if they keep it up. Pass it on to a firecracker! :-)

P.S. I thought the post that you wrote (and deleted) was so brilliant and I give you kudos for giving up the material things in life to have a life. You inspire people....don't forget that either.

Tiffany said...

In our house its Uncle T.J. - He is the "FUN" uncle with no children who prides himself on what influence he can have on our children! He has definitely come up with some good ones - sly like this, where it doesn't sound bad to the kids but then when they repeat it... Well lets just say, he gets the message across through them.

SO funny!

Flea said...

OHmommy, check out my blog on Monday morning, There will be something there for you. :)

andi said...

Oy, the short bus. That cracked me up.

My mother and her sister taught my three-year-old to say, "You're sexy grandma!" Nice.

-andi from Poot and Cubby

BusyDad said...

Hey, it's never too early to start learning short bus jokes. And if the kids have an uncle you can blame it on if need be? Even better!

goodmum said...

Hahaha! This reminds me so much of my "Friggin Idiots" convo's with my Little Man in the car. Why do these discussions always happen in the car? When we can't escape easily? Why?! ;-)

Wendi said...

FABULOUS!

LOVE IT!

THE SHORT BUS... bahaahaaa!!!!

 

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