Wednesday, November 26, 2008

Thankful for speed bumps

As a mother, I often find myself repeating "Each problem presents itself a learning experience." I whisper it to myself over and over again each day amidst the chaos in order to maintain my own sanity and make it through another day. I think parenting is an ongoing learning experience and half the time I have no idea what I am doing. No manual. No memos. Nada.

This Thanksgiving, amongst all of the traditional things I am very head-over-stilettos grateful for, I am also thankful for life's little speed bumps. I am very thankful for those moments. Those crazy moments in which I could cry my heart out but instead I try and learn from.

Take yesterday for example. In the midst of a blizzard I was running very late for school pick-up and shoved the girls in the minivan sans shoes and coats. I turned on the car, pumped up the Christmas music and opened up the garage door. But. The door was no match for me, was not fast enough for me, and before I knew it I backed up into it. BANG. OHmommy shaved the top off the minivan with the bottom of the garage door and the little roof-top spoiler/brake light thingy dangled in the way of the rear windshield wipers that were feverishly working to keep the snow off. SWOOSH. SWOOSH. "OOOOOHHHHHH Mommy! Daddy is gonna be mad."

What could you possibly learn from that? It was a very expensive lesson on the importance of slowing down.

Take last week for example. I ran to the grocery store with all three kids in tow at the height of dinner time for some much needed staples. Jay and Fifi were both feasting on cheeses, meats, cookies, breads, salad bar toppings, and other grocery store delicacies. My middle child Lola, my pickiest eater, was again fasting and unwilling to try anything. "You know, Lola. There will come a day that Fifi will be taller then you because of all the healthy food she eats and people will mistaken you for the baby sister." Lola turned to me eye-to-eye and very calmly replied, "That wouldn't be so bad. Maybe then you would kiss me as much as you kiss her." Sigh.

Ouch. Slap in the face, I could have vomited from the pain that I felt, in the middle of the olive bar. Fifi is my baby that opens her neck up, inviting me to kiss her every minute of the day and Lola is loud, dramatic, always seeking attention and never has her fill of cuddles. What could you possibly learn from that? It was a heart wrenching lesson on the importance of spreading my kisses equally.

So. Yeah. I am thankful for a lot of things. But this year, I am also thankful for life's little speed bumps that are thrown my way which force me to re-evaluate my parenting. They are my memos.

If you happen to be driving through the snowy Cleveland streets on your way to Thanksgiving dinner and pass by a burgundy minivan with missing break lights and roof top spoiler, do me a favor and wave HELLO. I will return the favor and wish you a very "Happy Thanksgiving Day."

PS. Do you like my new refreshed blog layout? I love it. Scroll down to the bottom... so fun! I am also very thankful for good friends that put up with my high-maintenance requests for perfection. Thank you Nap Warden! And thank you baby brother for putting up with my html questions during the middle of final exams!

59classy comments:

Rhea said...

Pretty, pretty new header!!

I needed this post today. I have hit some MAJORLY steep speed bumps tonight and am feeling raw and real.

You helped.

OHmommy said...

Happy Thanksgiving to you all!!!

Tootsie Farklepants said...

Wait, did you JUST change your layout because I swear I was here like half an hour ago and it was the old one.

Anywayyyy...Happy Thanksgiving!

April said...

Happy Thanksgiving, OhMommy! You're awesome.

Rachel said...

I loves it.
I love you.
Thank you for the reminder and I am so impressed with how you turned that around.

P.S. LOVE the look. She is fabu, isn't she :-)

Janah said...

Ohh, I do like the bottom! A very nice post! The kisses on the neck...uh, mine gets me with that every time! It's the best!
Happy Thanksgiving!

manolosonamission.com said...

It looks great! Very clean. I love Lola.

kim-d said...

The new blog look is very classy, indeed!

What you wrote about in this post is one of the many things that I love about coming here. You just "get it" in a world where it seems like that is becoming more of a rarity. Looking at those speed bumps as opportunities for growth and learning is another way to be a great example to your children. And I am thinking that Lola is getting lots and lots of kisses :).

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving!

Naomi said...

Oh yea .... it's a good change.

Yep - this post was a good one - and as it always seems, written just for me. Thanks for sharing it.

Bring on the speedbumps, if only we can all choose to learn something from them!

♥ spoiled mommy ♥ said...

I love the new look!!
Im trying to get me a "look".

Love the post...those slap you in the face moments are love/hate.

Mandy said...

I hate that that happened to your van. I knocked my side mirror off my van on a mad dash to get my child to school.

Oh yeah, about spreading the kisses equally, I need to do some of that too. My thirteen year old sometimes feels left out after I hold and care for the two and a half year old all day and night.

Mama Smurf said...

That was a fantastic post OHmommy! Thank you for remminder.

Have a very Happy Thanksgiving!

ps - love the new look.

LceeL said...

Sorry a bout the little parenting slap in the face. I know how those things can tickle your remembery for a while. It's like a mental bruise - it Takes a while before it stops hurting when you touch it.

But I do like you new nickname - OOOOOHHHHHHHmommy. It's so much more expressive than the current one.

Chickadee said...

Thanks for sharing that story. Last Monday, I smacked into a parked car in a friend's driveway b/c I was running late and being careless. I did LOTS of damage to my car and to the other car. My friend suggested that it was a sign: slow down. I must not have gotten the message, because an hour and a half later, as I was zipping along in my rental car, I got a speeding ticket for $161.00. Ouch. Now, I am turtle-slow. I got the memo.

Kim said...

I love the new look!!!

What a great reminder to just slow down.. I so need those kick every once in a while too..

I hope you and your family have a HAPPY THANKSGIVING!!!!

Tara R. said...

Speed bumps are a necessary evil in life. Thanks for the reminder to slow down and recognize the hard lessons too.

Love the Classy new look.

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours!

Courtney said...

I have been slapped in the face by the you kiss her more than me a couple of times. It definitely stings. The important thing is to learn from these speed bumps which you do. Great post, something every mother needs to hear...it's not just them.

Lisa@verybusymomwith4 said...

I am also constantly referring to problems as a chance to grow--I wish God was not constantly working on my big issue, patience ;)

Happy Thanksgiving!

Smart A$$ Mom said...

Is it a baby thing? Lil V always lets me smooch him. I do like the new layout. Fab!

michele said...

Great post! We do need to slow down. I was rushing out too and my husband did not put one of the yard tools away properly and my speeding out of the garage knocked it and it scratched up the side of my one year old car. I was so upset.

I noticed my six year old gets upset and asked the other day if I loved her. It makes you think when your baby is so easy to love due to lack of tantrums and attitude is their subconscious favoritism. I purposely try to give each kisses, hugs and lots of I love yous.

Happy Thanksgiving! I hope your hubby was not mad.

mwshores@bellsouth.net

Lisa said...

You do some of the best works with lemons of anyone I know! Good golly, they love keeping us on our toes, don't they?

Happy Thanksgiving, my dear! So much to be thankful for!

Megryansmom said...

I noticed the new look right away as a want ad for my town was staring me in the face. What are you trying to tell me OHMommy? Get off the computer and get a job! LOL

Have a wonderful Thanksgiving. And kiss Lola for me, poor neglected middle child.

Texan Mama @ Who Put Me In Charge said...

OH I can tell that Lola is the drama queen. Because clearly? she is mistreated. And neglected. And the red-headed stepchild, right? No???? Remember... sometimes the lesson you learn is: Begin to recognize when your kids are trying to take you on a guilt trip. They are smarter than they let on.

Have a great T-day.

Tee aka The Diva's Thoughts said...

Great lessons indeed!

Have a great Thanksgiving.

Steph @ Diapers and Divinity said...

That backing out of the garage thing? Done that. Misbalanced attention between my kids (and, ahem, the compter)? Been there.

Speed bumps? yes. Make the destination? I sure hope so!

Have a fantastic Thanksgiving.

Don Mills Diva said...

I am incredibly impressed that you can find the good in that incident with the van, which, incidentally, is just like something I would do!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Laura said...

Little memos - love it!

momof3crazykids said...

Love the new layout.
Happy Thanksgiving!

Tiaras and Tantrums said...

love your layout - very classy!
I have to tell you, I have been in such a hurry and have broken my rearview mirror off - TWICE! My hubs is ready to take my license from me if I do it again!
Your Lola sound like my daughter - and baby girls - so hard not to snuggle and smush - thanks for reminding me to spread the love!

happy Thanksgiving!

Immoral Matriarch said...

I am thankful that I met you. :)
I do like the new layout!

Tracey said...

Absolutely, my friend. Happy Thanksgiving!

Krystyn said...

I learned my very own lesson yesterday.

I locked the keys in the mini (thankfully, I had already gotten the kids out)!

Ouch with the kisses and Lola. They always go straight for the gut, don't they.

And, I love the new look. I'm still wanting to figure out the navbar at the top (maybe I need to bug your brother)!

Happy Turkey day!

Melissa said...

(((hugs)))

You sound like you could use a few! Happy Thanksgiving!!

the planet of janet said...

love the new look.

as for lola, don't forget that for SOME kids, they can never get enough ... and their perception is therefore skewed. (or screwed, whatever)

anyway, speed bumps are god's way of making us look out the window to make sure we didn't run over anyone.

happy thanksgiving, hon.

Amy said...

Ouch on the minivan!
Your lessons are wonderful, all lessons are wonderful. My problem is slowing down and taking the time to learn them. Great post! And I hope you have a fab Turkey Day!

Secret Agent Mama said...

Stalno da se radvame so sto ima me; sme blagoslovani. I jas stalno ke se radvam za tvojata prijetelstvo.

Happy Thanks Giving My Friend!

carrie said...

Happy Thanksgiving to you too! I am sure your day will be filled with even more wonderful blessings and happy moments.

Jaina said...

Beautiful. Those speed bumps are definitely places to learn if you can pause to think about it. I hope you have a fabulous Thanksgiving!

Stephanie said...

You're so right. Taking time to slow down is so much more important in the long run. We'll never get these days back and we should enjoy them as much as possible! Before we know it we'll be throwing our kids "classy" weddings and such and wonder where the time went!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Angie @ KEEP BELIEVING said...

Proufoundly analayzed for a hurried, commercial world to read. Thank you.

KEEP BELIEVING

NerdyRedneck Rob said...

You have only backed into the garage door once? Pfffft- amatuer!

melissa said...

love the new look!!
honey...i did the EXACT SAME THING in may. and the rear brake light thingy on the back window...still has to be replaced...along with the bottom 2 panels of my garage door (which was brand new to begin with!!) so...i hear ya and feel your pain.
happy thanksgiving!!

UrbanVox said...

Hey!!! That's looking cool! :)
I miss my bottom bit thing! mayby I'll have it back on the next template!! :)

Happy thanksgiving day! :)

Bethany said...

"loud, dramatic, always seeking attention and never has her fill of cuddles" is pretty much a perfect description of my four year old.

And I know all to well how those slaps in the face feel. Lately I have gotten a lot of: I want daddy, you are not my favorite, daddy is my favorite.

Love your take on the lessons. I will try to keep that in mind next time.

3 Peanuts said...

This is a great post. So true...there a lots of lessons life will us if we let it. Slowing down and spreading the kisses around are ones we all need to be reminded of. Happy Thanksgiving:)

Kim

DysFUNctional Mom said...

What a great post, and a great reminder.
Have a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Jill said...

Amen... though you seem to have MUCH more patience and understanding than I do. And the picky eater stuff - yeah... when you figure out a way to combat that, let me know!

Happy Thanksgiving Day!

Kelley said...

Love the new layout babe. Classy like me. I mean you.

Nah. I really mean me.

;)

Karen said...

Ooh, I thought I was bad backing in to the trash can at the end of my driveway!

Happy Thanksgiving!

Ali said...

i love the new layout. looks great!

happy thanksgiving!

The 5 Bickies said...

Dear OhMommy and Family,
Happy Thanksgiving!

Thanks for the reminder about speed bumps being our mothering memos.

~Bickies~

the mama bird diaries said...

have a wonderful thanksgiving, with speed bumps and all!

Kel said...

Happy Thanksgiving - I hope it is a great one!
~K

Beth from the Funny Farm said...

Happy Thanksgiving to you and yours! =)

Amanda said...

Amen to speed bumps!

4funboys said...

love the header... and thankful for those kind of moments too.

Blessings From Above said...

Oh no. Backing into the garage is something I would be likely to do, and actually am suprised that I have not yet. I did back into the babysitters car a few months ago, if that counts?!

Happy Thanksgiving.

CC said...

Sorry I couldn't wave to you!! But I'll be looking for your new "souped up" car :)

Al_Pal said...

Great post. Being reminded to slow down is an important one! Be glad it was the van and not you, eh?

Reminds me of the wisdom that Califmom tweeted from her 12 year old today: you can't pause life, but life can pause you.
http://twitter.com/califmom/status/2095689235

(I broke my left femur [thighbone] when I was 21. Yeah.)

Also, IDK if this is the blog design that was new then, but it is lovely. ;)

 

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