Tuesday, January 22, 2008

Dear God, it is me OHmommy...

“I am so cold, kiddos.”

“Mama, let’s go to Mexico. It’s not cold there!” Lola yells out loud. I grab my blanket and wrap it around myself. It is a chilly 9 degrees outside, we are wearing layers upon layers inside and are still cold.

“How will we get to Mexico? I didn’t buy any tickets.” I respond and crawl into our make-shift tent we created under my new dinning room table.

“We can drive. We Can!” Lola, again, yells. She comes in two levels, loud or VERY loud, and as a three year old believes that ANYTHING is possible.

“Oh. I don’t have the energy to drive to Mexico. Can YOU drive me to Mexico?” I ask her.

“That is silly, Mama. I can’t drive!” She yells. Seriously, I might need to check her hearing again. She had tubes put in her ears two years ago, maybe they don't work? Why, oh why, is she so loud?

“Mama. I have an idea!” My first born. My first love. My Jay jumps in.

“Sweet handsome fella… what idea do you have?” I ask him and turn my attention toward him.

“Just call GOD. Call him on the phone. Ask him to make it summer already. He'll listen. He always does.” He smiles. I smile. Oh, to be five years old.

“I don’t have God’s phone number.” I explain to him.

“Yes you do. You called him yesterday to tell him Lola was being bad. It HAS to be on the caller-id. Just check it.” He explains. Lola looks up at me and remembers that I did in fact call GOD yesterday to complain about her whinning.

“Okay. Handsome. You want me to call GOD?” What do I do? I have a Masters degree. I went to school for a VERY long time. I am educated. What. Do. I. Do? Do I actually pretend to call GOD and ask him for summer? I burned all of my parenting books years ago and never read THIS chapter.

What do I do?

“Hello. God. It is my Ohmommy. Yes, hi! How are you doing? I am fine. Except. It is a little too cold for us here in Ohio. Can you make it summer? Fast. M’kay. Thanks!”

I hang up the phone. Sweet little 11 month old Fifi is clapping her hands. For the first time in her life. Clapping out loud.

31classy comments:

Huckdoll said...

Oh my God. That was way cute.

the dragonfly said...

Aww, babies clapping!

And I love that Jay wanted you to call God on the phone. Priceless.

chichimama said...

Heh. I'll trade you Santa's number for God's number...

chickadee said...

Can you please remind God that here in Ohio, we are very patient. We do not have beautiful mountains to ski, arctic animals to admire. And we put up with this crap from November to May.

I'm with Jay...perhaps God could cut us a little break just this once??

But I'm also with Lola--another quick trip to Mexico might be just what you need!

Victoria said...

I wanna go to Mexico. Can you tell God that when you talk to him? Or her?

=)

Lisa said...

How stinking sweet is that! I do love a clapping baby!

What a good kid Jay must be to think of calling God.

Keep reminding yourself that Lola is going to be such a cute cheerleader in those little skirts you like so much. Her loud voice will serve her well!

As for how to answer these questions they hand to us....I dunno. Maybe tell them the reasons God needs us to have winter (which I'm not real sure of either!). Tell them how much more we'll love & enjoy spring, summer & fall after dealing with the hell of winter? Can you tell I'm on the same page with you & this dreaded winter crapola???

MamaWise said...

It's amazing how cold it has been lately here in Ohio. I think I may have to put in a call to God today too - maybe the more requests God gets, the more likely God will grant them! :)

Karen MEG said...

What a great post! Your kids are so sweet, baby clapping and all.
My 3 yo G also seems to have a megaphone inside her vocal chords, what's up with that?
I'm glad I've got a blogpal who's got a direct line to the Big Man ;)

Holly said...

What a sweet post! I love that child-like faith.

Kimmylyn said...

Your posts always make me tear with happiness. How cute.

ps.. can you pass me his number?

Stephanie said...

Bless your heart! I hate cold weather, too! I tell my husband I freeze up for the winter and don't thaw out until spring. I can never get warm, although this pregnancy is definitely aiding in slowing down the freeze process! Thanks for all the comments on my blog, I enjoy hearing from you!

Amy said...

Oh how sweet! I love clapping babies. You know in my house I just email God and Santa. Funny, in Texas, we're ready for summer to be over...
Stay warm!!

Caroline said...

So, how cold is it today? ;)

MommyTime said...

I'm just a tidge bit north of you, in Michigan, where it is also stunning cold...though not so stunningly as two days ago, when the high was 13. Today it's snowing a bit, which always warms things up. And that's a sentence I never in my life thought I'd ever write. So I sympthize.

Also, try Curls Rock or some other *Bed Head* brand product to control the astonishingly static-y hair that is always a result of spending too much time under a blanket fort in the winter. Besides having the best possible brand name ever for a mama, their stuff smells lovely and works like a dream.

Please forgive me for being presumptuous. Your photo clearly suggests you are completely gorgeous, so perhaps you never get the winter hair I get. But just in case...

lattemommy said...

It never ceases to amaze me how bloody adorable your kids are! How do you live with them??

Melissa said...

Ack! I hate questions like that. Hmm, how do you fudge your way out, I have to say you handled that pretty well.

It's 9 degrees here, too. I'm so ready for summer.

Flea said...

I'd have asked God for tickets to Mexico instead. :) Your kids sound adorable.

Smitty76 said...

Ooh, I just got goosebumps when you said your little one clapped for the first time! Great story...funny kids. :-)

LunaNik said...

the next time you call god, can you also ask him to make it warmer in NJ too, m'kay?...thanks ;)

Kelly said...

I'm clapping right along with her.
So cute.

Kathryn said...

Oh precious. Little sweeties.
And could you ask God to make it warmer in Wisconsin too?
Thanks.

Maria said...

That's cute. You're such a fun Ohmommy.

krissy said...

That was simply sweet! It is a chilling -10 below here in South Dakota. If God does answer your son's wish, maybe you can ask him to pass some warmth here as well.

My diva asked if we could move to Orlando where it is warm, sunny and has Shamu! We went there last January. I'm conteplating the request right now as I have the fireplace burning but still don't have feeling in my fingers from the trip outside earlier. Winter sucks!!!

Thanks for coming by my sad blog! Thanks for your pity over my Packers too! There's always next year *tear*

Kellan said...

Oh ... was a precious story!! I wish it were that easy, don't you? And - to have the faith of a little child - and then clap and wait for the results!! I loved this post - see you later. Kellan

Amy said...

I am still laughing. Do you know how long it takes to scroll to the bottom of the comments? And yet, I am still laughing.

You know one day they might figure it out, you know that God doesn't take phone calls or have an answering machine. Of course they could always call the church, leave a message there, maybe?
LOL

Rachel said...

Ha Ha.
Congrats of Fifi clapping and see.. mommy. That's why you don't lie :-)

I'll send you some of our 70 degree south Texas weather if you want it :-)

Steph said...

So cute! Can you pass on the big guys number I have a thing or two to tell him about the cold as well!

My Semblance of Sanity said...

PRECIOUS!
See what happens when you call God? He warmed your heart through Fifi's new talent!

BuzzeeDad said...

Well, if the weather doesn't warm up you can always blame it on technology. "Sorry kiddo. It's hard for God to get a good signal all the way up there. Maybe he heard wrong. let me email him."

Amy said...

so cute. i love how your daughter thinks you can just drive there. our friends moved back to ireland last year and my youngest tells me he's going to ireland every time he gets mad at me.

Rob said...

That is what I love the most about young'ns, ANYTHING is possible! That is such a great outlook that we all seem to forget as we age and get weighted down by “reality”.

 

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